Lost and Found
by Lady GreyWolf
Summary: *won second place at the Obidala FanForum FicAwards - theme was Aftermath of Battle* Obi-Wan grieves the loss of his master Qui-Gon Jinn as he wanders through the palace of Theed


**[Obi-Wan's POV]**

I was really glad to hear that the Council would let me stay on Naboo for a while, before both me and my Padawan, Anakin, would have to leave and return to the Temple. Anakin was thrilled, of course, and I felt that it was probably because of that he thought he would be able to spend more time with Queen Amidala.

It felt like I hadn't actually spoken to her. I had thought I had, but then she showed up to be Sabé, one of the Queen's personal lifeguards and friends. Qui-Gon had been raising an eyebrow at me when I held in a gasp back in the clearing, when Padmé had stepped up and showed us all that she was the real one, she was the Queen of Naboo. I was quite angry about not seeing it, it shouldn't be that easy to disguise oneself from a Jedi.

But, I might have been a bit overconfident in myself back then.

Now I wasn't. Qui-Gon, my beloved Master, was dead and gone and I was about to become a Jedi Knight and I would get my first Padawan, Anakin, who'd been chosen to be my Padawan by Qui-Gon. Really, I felt lost. I felt like everyone else was deciding what I was supposed to do, like I could do nothing, like I was just a small toy that they moved around to different locations.

I muttered and continued through the dark, empty corridor of the castle. I saw the lights of Theed outside the big windows to my left, but I ignored it. What I needed was definitely not a reminder of how we'd sneaked up through the city to get to the castle, where the battle…

I placed a hand on my forehead, closed my eyes for a moment and got rid of the memories. That was not what I needed to think about right now.

To be honest, I didn't want to look out through a window and see all of the familiar locations from above once again. Problem was that there were windows everywhere, thanks to the previous battle some of them had been smashed which meant that the sound of the town in the middle of the night reached my ears.

I closed my eyes and walked faster, turned left, then right, walked up a long set of stairs and entered yet another corridor. I groaned when I realised that it was designed exactly like the previous one.

I almost ran through it and reached the end of it. As I figured I must be closer to the top now, there shouldn't be any more corridors left to visit. Hopefully.

And sure enough, the next set of stairs was not straight as the previous one; this one went up in a spiral. Higher and higher I climbed, passing several doors on my way, until the stairs ended at one lonely door at the top of the castle. I carefully opened it.

The room on the other side had no windows to the sides. Instead it had a roof that could be opened so that the one lying on the floor was able to see the stars above.

This I noticed since there was already someone in the room, lying on the floor, looking up at the stars.

With a startled cry she got to her feet, her brown hair spinning round her head. A scent of strawberries hit my nose.

"Oh… I…"

"How did you find me?" she asked.

"I wasn't looking", I answered, looking away.

"Yes you were", she muttered and sat down once again. "Don't lie to me."

"I'm not lying", I answered, starting to get annoyed. "I… I was…"

I sighed and closed the door behind me.

"I was trying to find somewhere where I wouldn't be reminded of what has happened, Your Majesty."

She turned around, surprised. I felt like her brown eyes pierced my very soul and quickly looked away.

"I'm sorry, Master Kenobi, I forgot", she said, sounding ashamed. "It's just…"

Now she was the one to sigh. She pulled up her knees and put her arms around them while looking up into the sky.

"When we were out there, when I didn't have to be the Queen, when I could be Padmé, I felt like myself", she said, her voice sad. "And even though I helped my people and we're all free again, and I do not have to look for assassins every day, I feel… lost…"

I stared at her. Was she _lost_? That couldn't be true. She was the Queen, she only needed to wave her hand and things would be done for her. While I, on the other hand, was bound to the Order. And, don't misunderstand me, I do love the Order and I would willingly give my life for them, but sometimes it's not enough.

"You know, you're quite lucky, Master Kenobi", she continued, still looking at the stars. "You get to travel, you do not have to stay in one place, you can take care of yourself…"

"Can I?" I sighed. She looked back at me, probably noticing the sad tone in my voice. I slowly walked up to her and sat down.

"I'm not sure that I'm as free as you think I am, Your Majesty", I said, looking at my hands. It was a bad habit that I'd had when I was a child, when I was unsure of what to say. While I was Qui-Gon's Padawan I had, slowly, learned to hide if I was nervous or unsure, but now, when he was gone, I slipped back.

"I am bound to the Order. Whatever orders they give me, those are orders I need to follow. I can, of course, tell the Council my opinion. That was what Qui-Gon usually did, and he was never liked by them. Therefore, if I want them to like and trust me, I need to go with their decisions. When I do not have any missions, I stay in the Temple. And, honestly, now when Qui-Gon's gone…"

I turned to look at her and she met my gaze.

"I'm not sure what to do. I think I'm just as lost as you are."

She blinked.

"I'm sorry, I didn't…" she begun, but I shook my head.

"We both assumed that the other one was luckier", I told her. "I believe that's human."

She suddenly smiled at me. It was the first time that I'd actually looked at her when she smiled and I realised that I liked it. I actually wanted her to smile like that towards me all the time.

"Well, then we are two lost people who've found one another", she said and gently squeezed my hand. I smiled at her and squeezed back.

I'm not sure how long we sat there on the floor, or lay down, for that matter, since that was what we did afterwards when our necks started to hurt from the constant bend so that we could look at the stars. Maybe it was just one hour, maybe it was several, but I think it was one of the best times I've ever experienced.

"Obi-Wan?"

"Mhm?" I answered. I liked hearing her call my name. Not too many people did that; nowadays it was just 'Master Kenobi' all the time.

"Are Jedis from a constant bloodline?"

I blinked. That question I certainly hadn't expected.

"I… I do not think so…"

"But you told me about these… what are they called… midi-chlorians?"

I nodded and she continued.

"Well, they are often transferred by blood, right? That could mean that someone of your ancestors was a Jedi as well."

I stared at her. What she was saying made perfect sense, even more; it was the most logical thing I've ever heard. One of my ancestors could have been a Jedi as well or I couldn't have the amount of midi-chlorians that made me one.

After a while, I sighed.

"I think that we both need to go to bed", I said. "Or people will start looking for both of us, and it will only be a matter of time…"

"I know", she sighed and rose. I rose as well, standing in front of her. She grabbed her long coat that she'd put on one of the benches alongside the wall, but stopped right before walking out through the door.

"You…"

I was silenced by her sudden kiss. Her lips were soft and careful as they brushed against my own. I felt electricity run through my body and grabbed her, pulled her closer and closed my eyes. This was probably the first and only kiss I would ever share with someone and I wanted to remember it, forget about the Council for a while and just be me.

She didn't resist. In fact, she pulled my face down towards her so that she could kiss me even more. I had never thought that it could feel so good.

Then, faster than the wind, she released me and was gone before I opened my eyes again. I stood still for a couple of minutes, trying to calm myself down again. When I finally reassumed my regular heartbeat, I felt warm. For the first time in days, I felt warm, safe and happy. I smiled as I walked down the dark stairs and hurried back to my room.

When I lay down on my bed, I smiled again. I even chuckled softly. Love had struck me like a bolt of lightning and even though we were both forbidden to carry on, I had a feeling we would.

After all we were two lost people who'd found one another.


End file.
